Feeling so at peace.
The last two months I've been at odds in a lot of ways. Trying to triumph over life (cough - work), while rebuilding all my priorities to put a man right at the top. One would think it is as easy as grabbing him by the wrist and marching to the very top of my Steps of Priority and saying, "EVERYONE, PLEASE MOVE DOWN ONE. I'd like to put a man right here at number one." Except then work came down hard right at the same time. And multiple life transitions don't work like a little sliding shuffle. Rather, it seems that if multiple transitions happen worthy of the top five steps - baby, job, man, etc. - then every other life priority just disseminates altogether. As if their response is, "FINE, then we're out!" And just like that you've broken up with the entire internal structure of yourself. And then you spend the next couple months coaxing each one back in individually, saying no I do want you, it's not like that, I still love you, please sit back down here on the steps of my peaceful life alignment. Ah look, balance! NO, SUGAR, GET OUT! EXERCISE, SIT BACK DOWN! SCRIPTURE READING, STOP CHATTERING WITH HULU AND GO BACK TO YOUR SEAT AT THE TOP!
And now we know why my sister became the elementary teacher and not me. Though I do enjoy her texts about the "gremlins," as she calls some of her students.
Anyway, I came here to say that my Steps of Priority are finally feeling calm, and the last few days have been sublime. I realized the extreme importance of giving my full energy to one thing at a time. Then letting everything else quietly sit or settle as it may. And now, I am full of gratitude. Grateful for a Heavenly Father who gives little guiding steps, as I actively work to find my resting place. His system of letting us learn for ourselves is so empowering and growth-promoting and rewarding.
Upward and onward,