Ready and EXCITED!
03 October 2016
Yesterday I began packing my delivery bag. I have been so eager and excited to go into labor and bring Charlotte out. I packed a little outfit for Charlotte and a little snuggly blanket. I was so happy!
Preparing for this delivery has been such a highlight for me. Last week, I was driving through a part of Provo where I used to train for my marathons, and then where I later ran them. I also thought about this part of town where I studied endlessly for my CPA license, and then went and took the test. I thought of how these experiences have been sooo much like preparing for labor, and I have enjoyed it so much. I quite like pushing myself and aiming for something that seems so impossible. I remember with my marathons and with CPA testing, in the beginning there is just pure feelings of ammunition. I am motivated and focused and giving everything I have to the goal. And then, as the time gets closer and the goal is suddenly near and looming in sight, there is always a period of a couple weeks where I feel huge doubt and nervousness. And this is usually paired with having to pull back in my training or my studies because I am just fatigued. What was I thinking? I can't accomplish something this big. This is beyond my abilities.
The same happened with preparing for this labor. Several weeks ago, those nerves hit, and I felt shaky. This is going to be so intense. I don't think I can do this.
So I pulled back in my preparations, re-centered, and now I feel ready as ever! I love this feeling - approaching such a huge endeavor and knowing how much effort I've put into this.
Upward and onward,