Friends and acceptance win

26 November 2014

My good friend Katie came into town last week, which she texted me a few days prior, and then the day she got into town, immediately came into the studio to visit Lizzie and I.  Her hubs and new baby in tote.  I'm positive they left their house in Indiana and drove straight to our office in Provo.  That's how excited we all were to see each other.

Katie and Brent sat down on the pod chairs between mine and Lizzie's desks.  And we proceeded to chat for 4 hours, updating each other on every detail, right down to the personal grit.  We ended with a super interesting conversation about shame, as Brent is a PhD shame researcher (like Brene Brown).  He did a study on the underground BYU atheist community and how all of them arrived at their beliefs from feeling shamed by peers for fallbacks or questions they had.  Oh so fascinating!  And makes me plant an even firmer stand against rule-pointing and pushing individuals under a limbo bar of standard that they aren't able to bend for yet.  Struggling People: One-for-All and All-for-One!  That's my Newsie's theme dance.  We should give people our shields, not our swords.

Anyway, on Tuesday, Katie came back to our office, sat on the filing cabinet, and we chatted again for the rest of the day, passing the babe between us. Katie remarked that on her way out last time, Brent asked if the friends he left in this town were true friends.  "Of course!" Katie replied, "why?"

He replied, "Because I don't have relationships with them like you have with Chantel and Lizzie.  Where you can talk about everything.

That really touched me.

Here's to endless friends.  The kind where the ground is safe to share it all.

Upward and onward,

Sneaking out of work last summer...

And because I find great unity in honoring the struggles within each of us:

In bed that night I invented a special drain that would be underneath every pillow in New York, and would connect to the reservoir. Whenever people cried themselves to sleep, the tears would all go to the same place, and in the morning the weatherman could report if the water level of the Reservoir of Tears had gone up or down, and you could know if New York is in heavy boots.
—  Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close


  1. I WAS SO LEFT OUT. my reservoir of tears just went up.
    love you BOTH ;)

  2. I JUST READ THIS!! OH I ADORE YOU! I was so glad that i got to spend as much time as i could with you during our short visit. do you know what you are one of my most very favorite humans? you ARE a true friend and will always be! i also read some of your other blog posts. can we also google hangout sometime soon? corbin misses you too!