Happy to help

26 November 2014

My brother-in-law asked me to go to IKEA to grab some Christmas items for him.  SURE!!! :)))))) I said. Because I love doing service for people and never even complaining about it.  And then he says, okay, I'm going to text you every day until you go. 

And trust me, he did.

So I get to IKEA after a Tucano's dinner date with Ryan and friends.  Which yeah, okay, I've been to IKEA once before, but I forgot that you have to fill out a missing persons form and tape it to the front door when you enter. At least that's what I did.

Five minutes of being completely lost, even after using the computer navigation system to find this item, and talking to worker man to find a "flort."

"A what?" He asked.

"a FLORTTTT! You should be telling ME what that is!"

"It's in the home organization section,"  he says.

Which could be clarified more specifically because.... everything I see is in some way purposed to "organize" the home.

I even tried calling the store beforehand to tell them to go get this thing for me and have it waiting.  Like a call-in order.  But I spent 20 minutes with an automated system, pushing all the buttons she instructed me to, and then the system hung up on me.  At what point was that an option?  Press 9 if you're finding this to be a nuisance.  Okay, goodbye.  Well, I was never good at the choose-your-own adventure novels, as my character always ended up dead, and now I see how that foreshadowed my customer service destiny.

I was just about to call the police to report myself missing and tell them my taped notice on the door included a self-drawn portrait that was perfectly accurate to what I thought I would look like twelve hours from my time of entrance.

But instead, I thought..... payback. I'm going to text my brother-in-law every two minutes until I find this flort.

And trust me, I did.

Upward and onward,


  1. hahaha the last one is amazing. this is the best.

  2. Very funny!!! Face #6 looks about right. What is a flort anyway?