The oxytocin of friends

30 April 2015

There are people you are born with and then there are the people you find … I have found my people in the cubicle next to me, in the apartment upstairs from me, and in my book club. One morning one friend brings another friend running, and it sticks forever. Other times the funny stranger across the table at an industry lunch is just who you need in your life. Don’t get me wrong. There aren’t loads of Your People out there. That is why it is important to be on the lookout. Your People are hard to find.
Satellite Sisters


Last night, I went to Sharla's again.  She opened the door with a smile on her face, revealing a brand new pixie cut.  I nearly died.  That hairstyle is SO attractive to me on women.  I told her that I mad crush when women cut their hair like because now their clavicle bones and jawbones and cheekbones are so exposed and scream for flattery.   Men dig the long locks, but man, I dig the women with the short hairzies.

And our conversation started there.  We talked about sensuality, the way women appreciate beauty, feeling pleasure from a lovely thing.  It's a healthy swirl of love chakra energy, but it has nothing to do with sexuality.  A noteable distinction so that we don't silence our sensuality, which spurs enjoyment and appreciation.  (But speaking of sexuality, Sharla showed me this excellent resource for the best way to approach sexuality by age group).  Then Sharla told me how gratitude is the highest vibration of energy, even above the vibrations of love for another.  Gratitude.  Which really excited me because well, first, I very much believe in the flow of energies, and second, releasing a vibration of gratitude is something I can always do.  As I said yesterday, love needs room to pulse, space and time to expand and contract, expand and contract.  But gratitude can always be consistent.  Open your hands in every moment, pull everything into your chest as Sharla showed me, and be grateful.  Even if things around still remain messy and chaotic, still pull your hands into your chest and say you're grateful.

The night continued, and Sharla and I kept loosening up and getting more silly.  It's been nice to have a scheduled friend night with her every other week for the last couple months.  Of course it started as nights of Body Talk, getting my energy work on.  And before that it started when I was still a gangly teenager and Sharla's younger sister was one of my high school best friends, and Sharla was the much cooler and wiser older sister that we only saw in the hallways at school with her cooler and wiser friends.  So Sharla has been in my life for awhile, but she's never been IN my life like she is now.  And each time I go see her, my stay extends.  An hour.  Two hours.  Four hours...  And now we're reading The Queen's Code together (THAT I RECOMMEND TO EVERYONE) and starting a 6-week energy work program together (which I also invite you to join with us if you want).

Later in the evening, Ryan called to report on his soccer game, and he remarked that every time I spend an evening with Sharla, I emanate.  He can tell something really connects us.  And there is.  There is A LOT that connects Sharla and I.  Our departures, our becomings, our relationships, our blueness, our destiny and callings. 

Divergent.  That was our word last night.

Did you know spending time with a good friend is one of the best ways to release oxytocin?

Upward and onward,

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1 comment :

  1. You emanate. I love that! It's such a blessing to have friends you can talk about real things with. Difficult to find.